Lifestyle

How to control your emotion

have you ever felt like your emotions are taking you for a ride when you really, really don't need them to do that right now? Well, you're in luck. There are ways of controlling your emotions
(or, at the very least, your reactions to those emotions) whether you're sad or too excitable or if you are really hurt and feel like falling to pieces. Read on.

1 Control your breathing: Some people assume that emotions are "all in your head," whereas actually all emotions are just plain ol' physical responses. You are running on Human version 2.013. In all of us, anger pushes heart rate and blood pressure up (which is why having an angry temperament is a predictor of heart disease); as a result, our breathing changes. Anger and anxiety can only "work" if match the breathing pattern -- taking quicker, more shallow breaths. So stop it. Take time to:
After a slow exhale, quit breathing for five seconds.

Inhale slowly, focusing on your diaphragm. Breathe in until your lungs are full of air, from top to bottom.

Then breathe out even more slowly (aim for a count of 20). While you do this, imagine that you are breathing in relaxation that is filling your body from head to toe.
Keep doing this, concentrating on the out-breath that will calm everything down.

Panic is associated with short, fast, shallow breaths; anger with long, forced breaths; calmness with slow, steady breaths; happiness with long inhalations and exhalations.

2 Go for a walk: Alright, that's sort of metaphorical. But what that means is to control an emotion, control your environment. Get out and do something else. If you feel yourself festering, get up and surround yourself with different stimuli. You're literally forcing your brain to take in distractions.

You initially won't want to do anything else. It'll feel good to sit and consume yourself with whatever is making you sad or angry. Hate to break it to you, but you can't do that. Pick up the phone and call a friend, put on some upbeat music, or simply go run errands. Be your own source of distraction.


3 Keep your head up: Literally. If you were told there was a depressed person in the next room, what would you imagine? Are they sitting in the corner, slumped over, with a lost look on their face? Are they not moving much? Probably. Moods manifest physically -- change your physicality, change your mood.

Confident, happy people walk with their shoulders back and their heads high. Do they make a conscious decision to do this? No. It's all wired together. So get up, look up, and move around -- your mind will start listening to your body and not the other way around.

Think about working out. How often do you hear of someone going for a run to help their bad mood? All the time. Again, let your body do the talking. The endorphin rush will blast that mood away.

4 Meditate: For a long time, meditation has been known to quiet the outside world and calm the senses. It clears your mind and helps attention and focus even when you're not meditating. But it also quiets negative thoughts and centers you externally, not internally.
In other words, your stream of consciousness gets removed from the "me" and placed outwardly. Scientific studies involving brain imaging and MRIs show that expert meditators cease thinking about themselves and are less likely to get wrapped up in emotion, at all hours of the day.

5 Talk about how you feel: The best way to solve something that's upsetting you is talking to someone, even if it's your dog. Talking about things helps to make things clearer and tends to help your brain sort out situations.
Sometimes, when we talk to others, we finally realize just how ridiculous we're being. Repeating the story gives it a tangibility it didn't have in this world and sets it up against real, bigger problems. Suddenly your boyfriend dumping you doesn't seem so bad compared to your friend's dad having cancer.

6 Start the day in a positive way: Nobody wakes up and thinks, "Today I'm going to have a really awful day." Most people wake up and don't even think about the day ahead. Try this: "Today is going to be a good day!" This way, you start the day having a positive outlook on life.
Try being as nice and positive to everybody and set yourself simple little tasks during the day. For example, "Today, I shall eat five pieces of healthy fruit or vegetables" or "I shall smile at that boy or girl I have liked for ages." Meeting your goals -- even if they're tiny -- can give you a sense of fulfillment and, better yet, control.